In January 2016,I was a fourth year law(my Honor’s final exam ended in June,2016)student of a reputed public university when I said yes to my classmate,my best friend.I have felt for anybody in my life,he was my first love. At that time one of my teachers was bothering me for some immoral reasons,even I was threatened by him.My best friend aka boyfriend was really helpful in case of sorting out that problem and yes, during that period of time I felt for him,he proposed me and I said yes.At first I was quite confused but later on,I was in love with him madly because of his caring,loving nature.After that, 1.5 years passed like a dream,we were so happy,a famous couple in the campus, he was the best thing I could ever ask for,that’s the only thing I want to say about that happy period.I was preparing for BCS exam after LL.M. and he wanted to get himself enrolled in the corporate world,next was to complete an MBA. I knew he was from Sreepur of Gazipur,he studied in DRMC before university, I talked to his mother and sister several times(as they knew about us),his father was a college teacher like mine.He used to smoke a lot,used to drink sometimes,I put an end to those,I used to help him in studies as I had a better academic result than him.

After our LL.M. written exam,in May 2017,he came back to Dhaka,that’s when all the problems started.Just after 3days of leaving the university, he changed dramatically, He started ignoring me,used to misbehave with me for no reasons,stopped talking to me over phone. First I thought he might need some space,so I only used to call him 3/4days after only to say a few formal words,it hurt me,it was painful,but I just wanted him to calm down.I used to tell him to apply for different MNCs,taking preparations,but he was passing his times idly with his local friends in Dhaka,wasting time. He was a whole new person whom I didn’t know. But before leaving for Dhaka he promised me to wait for him as he will talk to our families and soon we will be married. I was the one who was waiting for him in another city,reckoning our loving memories,patiently.

It was 25, July, 2017,for our LL.M. viva he came back to our city after two months, he was like the person before, the same loving person, he acted as if nothing really happened and,yes,I forgot everything and passed those 3 days with our other friends and obviously him,again I was happy.He left for Dhaka after that.

Again for no reason he stopped talking to me for a long time,and I got sick.I went to Dhaka for treatment for a long month(September, 2017),but he did not meet me once.I came to my hostel in that city on 2nd,October,2017.

These two are just two of many incidents of the next 1.5 years(June,2017-January2019).He misbehaved with me for no damn reason,then I used to forgive him.And whenever I wanted to end this relationship he used to stop me by creating every drama he could create.

Time passed,I stayed in another city,because I knew that I was so deeply in love with him that I would have fled away with him and get married,as my parents were strongly against this relationship,so I didn’t shift in Dhaka for 1.5 years.In this period I got to know that he had a garments buying house of his own,16 employees working under him,an office space of his own,his business was running good as he changed his mind about MNC jobs.All of these informations were told by him,I didn’t doubt or mistrust him.On 28th October, 2018, he proposed me infront of our friend circle for marriage with a diamond ring and I said yes.I had stopped reacting at him a long time ago,as I was prepared for any grave consequences.He used to stop talking to me for months,if I called him he used to scream,he yelled,he called me names,compared with other girls he knew.But In front of our friends he revealed all his plans regarding the wedding,the reception and all that.Then I shifted in Dhaka in December2018 as I was planning my dream wedding in my mind.When I came to Dhaka,he seemed to be so busy that he couldn’t meet me.In January,again he became that monster I was afraid of.As I loved him so much and he has always been this much charming I thought everything will be okay after marriage.I was convinced that he was misbehaving just out of workpressure and stress. And he was always good to me in person,whenever he was away from me he misbehaved over phone. He used to tell me that all his hard works are for me,my future,even he convinced me to leave the idea of being a BCS cadre officer and I left my dreams just to be with him. So I was hell bound to marry him.My parents were against it,they had stopped talking to me normally just because of this guy.Even I broke my 3marriage proposals for him.

His plan was to meet me on 19th January,2019, as it was our so called anniversary,then to plan the wedding.But all of a sudden on 14th January I found all his numbers switched off. As he was behaving roughly I had to stop talking to him on 10th January.After 3days I called him I called all of our friends,our teachers, but they didn’t know a single thing.Last of all I mailed him on two of him email ids and I got a reply on 26th January saying he had left for Germany for higher studies and he doesn’t want to contact me,Voila!!!!

As I had been suffering from a long period, I got really strong inside of myself which I didnot know.I was utterly shocked for some hours,but later on I woke up from my hallucination.I trusted him blindly for this three years,but for the first time I thought and thought for hours and then i called his parents.And trust me,this was more shocking than anything…….

First, his mother denied to recognise me,she acted like she’d never talked to me in her total life time,then I talked to his father.To my utter surprise,he told me that his son had taken a huge amount of money from him for his Mphil in Germany by selling lands,his son had never any business,never bought a car.Even when i asked him about the huge amount of money which I saw on his mobile messages for his debit cards,he didn’t know anything. I knew I had to know more,endure more.I sent one of my friends to his home area.Then I knew his family is really a simple village family,where the younger brother studies in a Madrasa,younger sister got married in nearby village just after her HSC in last year.All these big words about family status, money were lies.If it was family reputation or status(it doesn’t matter in love,I know that) definitely my family would’ve rejected his family.As he used to tell me big lies about his family,status,money……

Even two of my friends who went to Germany in September of last year informed me that,the time I was telling them about,no academic session starts in Germany and they couldn’t collect a single damn information about him,even when they searched for him for two weeks.Later,I got to know that he has always been a spoiled child of the family,he was a playboy keeping contacts with divorced or married or senior GIRL FRIENDS (as he didn't need any commitment to be with them,both of them could be there for own benefits),and he could not leave me as I was so loyal to him,loved him with all my heart and I was a classmate (if he’d left me without any logic,he could have been branded as a bad guy in front of our friends),I have always been a religious girl,Only Allah knows how many times I’d prayed for him,and how many times I asked for his help to save my honor.And HE listened to my urges,saved me from any grave consequences.Only Allah knows,where he is now.I just want to leave him be.

And this period of three years was just like puffed in the air,I was made to live in lies.

Everything I wrote is just a simple summary of the actual story.The reality was more crucial, I suffered immensely.I judged myself, doubted myself, changed myself just because of him. I lost a lot of important time of my career,I think the loss is irreparable.But,when I knew his real face,I moved on.I know when it hurts.I also know how it feels knowing that with all the good intentions,a good heart full of love, dreams gets shattered and you get cheated.

Sometimes I think I should publish his photograph and write down everything he’d ever done to me just to make other girls aware of him,as he did this to many other girls.In the last six months,I got to know that he is such a vile creature with an abominable character,so I had shut myself and was grateful to Allah that it just happened on the right time,otherwise I’d have blamed myself for the rest of my life.Recently I got to know that he is keeping contacts with one of his married girlfriends and spreading that I was the one who left him for some better option or out of high ambitions,he’d not contacted any of our friends, but he is contacting with some of the juniors of our university,that vile woman and they are gossiping about me.(I am not bothered at all,as they are not a part of my life)But the only thing that kept boggling my mind is,I don’t know where he is, may be right now he is doing the same thing with some other girl,that’s why I wrote my story. 

Only Allah knows how I had endured all the sufferings.

Solution by an expert

You have narrated your story beautifully. After reading your full story, I am feeling very heavy dear. You had to go through the unbearable pain for the past three years. The way you loved him, trusted him and believed him, but what he did, of course not acceptable at all. You got betrayed over and over by the same person whom you loved and trusted the most. Only a person who has gone through such a situation can understand how painful it is. I can understand a very imperative time of your life has been wasted. Indeed, it sacked your studies as well. You are a strong, brave and a positive person that you have moved on after knowing his real character. It is obviously praiseworthy. All I want is that everybody can think positively like you. This was just a short phrase of your life dear. You can still put your life in order. You can still chase your dreams. It’s never too late to do such things. Best wishes for you.