We have learned about two myths of parenting in our 1st episode. I hope you are trying to discard those myths from your lives. It is now or never. The earlier you realize the harm of believing the myths, the earlier you can perform mindful parenting. Lets’ look into two more myths today.

Myth # 3 It is useless to express emotions in front of a child, he is too young to understand. – Wrong!

Expressing your emotions is very important for your child. Babies respond through facial expressions in a very basic way from birth and since then they have been watching and learning your facial expressions. Within the first few months, babies begin to notice their parents and begin to understand how the world around them should react. This is called social referencing – they are using it as a reference to understand what they are seeing in their social relationships.

When a 2-year-old child goes down to the playground, they must look at their guardian before crying. If they notice that her parent is worried, the child will start crying whether she is in pain or not. A child begins to read the folds of his parents’ face, eyebrows, rolling of eyeballs from the beginning of theirs lives. They also begin to understand the meaning of deep breathing, hugs and laughter. Social referencing is an early step in the development of empathy. The ability to be sensitive to the feelings of others and to be able to express one’s own emotions teaches one to express one’s own opinion while respecting the opinion of others.

“Emotional intelligence begins to develop in the earliest years.
All the small changes children have with their parents, teachers
and each other, carry emotional messages.”
-Daniel Goleman, American Author and Journalist

Myth # 4 Children should refrain from painful experiences. – Wrong!

It is ok to prevent children from having loss, experiencing difficult situations, or injuries. But refrain from saying, “Nothing bad can happen to my children”. If you want your children to grow up to be resilient adults, you just cannot expect it to happen like magic. Let them know that it is ok to be sad. Talk to your children about their emotional regulations. Teach them that it is ok to lose sometimes, it is ok to lose someone. We must teach them sometimes “letting it go” is good for emotional well-being. Introducing them coping with the coping strategies from a very early age very laudable, encouraging, and effective in order to bring up a happy resilient child. Only Resilient you can bring up a resilient child.

“Resilience is knowing that you are the only one
that has the power and the responsibility to pick yourself up.”
-Mary Holloway, Writer and Resilience coach

Real world is a harsh place to be. If we do not introduce our children the coping strategies in this harsh world, a sudden introduction as an adult may lead them to severe emotional dysregulation.

Let them feel, let them heal.
That should be the motto.

Dr. Irin Binte Azad
Parent Educator and Counselor
Women Support Initiative Forum (WSIF)
General Physician
Trained in NDD and Inclusive Education, IER, DU
Trainee in NDD, IPNA, BSMMU