Today is the last episode of Myths of parenting. So far, we have learned myths about parenting styles, children’s emotional regulation, milestone parenting, and tantrum management. Let’s know about the myths on environmental influences around them.
Myth # 9
Confliction within families does not influence children. – Wrong!
Quarrel is inevitable in any relationship. But it has no impact on children’s mental health, it is utterly wrong. When someone is being disrespected or dominated in a relationship, children are also learning to disrespect and dominate that person. We expect our children to learn moral values, but we tend to model gender dominance in the context of Bangladesh. When you are having a fight, try to maintain privacy. If the child is curious, keeping a sense of respect for each other, tell them that it is just a phase of a relationship. Teach them that having a different opinion on the same topic is absolutely fine and we can come to a sensible decision through an argument. The sense of respect, equality, and inclusivity results from the environment, the children are given to grow up. Always remember that!
“The best security blanket a child can have is parents who respect each other.”
– Jane Blaustone, An Author and Parenting Coach
Myth # 10
All children can learn the same thing in the same manner. – Wrong!
Every child is unique and has a different pattern of understanding, learning, and communicating. Some cope up properly within a joint family, some do better in a nuclear family. Some even grow up to be good in single parenting. Some are good at keeping up the grades, some are good at being only creative, some are both. Neglecting the child’s potential only makes him/her less self-esteemed. “We were parented that way and this way; we grew up just fine. So, it should be the same for our kids”, these claims do not go with the situation we are currently in. There will be evolution of society, generation, human nature, technology, and environment. Parenting techniques will be evolved with the time and surroundings as well. So, refrain yourself from thinking that all children can learn the same thing in same manner.
“A child is a beam of sunlight from the Infinite and Eternal, with possibilities of virtue and vice, but as yet unstained.”
– Lyman Abbott, An American Author for children’s book.
Parenting can be struggling, exhausting and imperfect. Everyone has their unique style of parenting for their unique children. Parenting cannot be effective if we only go by parental lead. Understanding of both children and parent is a must for developmental, effective and encouraging growth of children and for effective parenting.
Signing of from the Myths of parenting. Hope you have enjoyed it. Let us know if you have something in mind as “Myths of Parenting”.
Dr. Irin Binte Azad
Parent Educator and Counselor
Women Support Initiative Forum (WSIF)
General Physician
Trained in NDD and Inclusive Education, IER, DU
Trainee in NDD, IPNA, BSMMU
